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slayboybunny:

"sir what you did is literally 100 percent illegal"
"ok but get this: im a rich white person" 
"oh sorry about that sir" 

(via omgmalene)

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barbidreamdumpster:

if you want to ask a bisexual or asexual person about their sexual history to verify that they’re queer, but you don’t want them to take it the wrong way, try this useful communication technique:

give them twenty dollars and go away.

(via ouranhighschoolhitclub)

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drinklust:

once i got very drunk in a bar and my mum had to pick me up so i was trying to act normal by keeping the conversation so i asked her if shes a virgin and she looked at me with pain in her eyes and said “i wish i was”

(Source: drinklust, via november-fourteenth)

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taur:

do you ever wonder how a character is doing after a series is over

(via lubricakes)

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dumb-science-jokes:

Sex is a lot like science class, you experiment, wear lab coats, Bill Nye is there.

(via sexwithashtonirwin)

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